How do you spread light?

It’s been yet another long day of work. Something I’ve always thought about was - how do I spread light into this world, to my colleagues, reflect God’s presence and love? 

I’m not trying to evangelize everyone I meet, to be honest, I probably don’t even talk about Christ enough with even friends, but I always wanted to be one of those, “there’s something different about Julia. Oh, it’s because she’s a Christian!”  

I will admit that this did get into my head and I definitely tried to play this “I’m always happy and bright” or “I can be a kind person” - person for a while. But do you know what happens when you act “bright” and “nice” because you want people to view you this way? It gets exhausting and you will quickly realize you’re lying to yourself. 

I realized the hard way this “brightness” is a gift from God and you get it by building a relationship with Him. It’s by praying, trusting, reading, listening to Him (and my personal favorite, Christian music) that I can feel His warmth, so I’m easily able to be whoever He set me to be without caring about my reputation, wondering if I’m being genuine, but most importantly, not feeling exhausted. 

I used to be so good at asking God to help me write an email, lead meetings, to even give me wisdom on how I talk to my colleagues, but I’ve been doing this less and less since working from home. I can feel myself feeling more anxious at work, stressed, pressure... this isn’t how it’s supposed to be! 

I miss the days when even during the craziest and most stressful days, I made it alive feeling at peace and stayed calm during a storm. 

I need to challenge myself to listen to Christian music through the day more and give God a, “hello! I’m here, not sure what to say but I need your help to get through today. Is it selfish for me to ask for your help, your wisdom, and for peace in my heart? Okay, I know it’s selfish to ask you to help me succeed and perform well at work today but... I’m going to ask you for this help anyways, because I could really use the extra support. In Jesus’s name, amen.” 

Maybe I’ll try to share some Christian tunes that’s been on replay.

Thanks for reading,

 Julia